Dear, POTS(Still aint ready to give up no names)
I really do care about you, and your future and the decisions that you make in your life. I don't want to see anything bad or "unfortunate" happen to you. I want you to live up to your FULL potential. However, I cannot compete with the streets. It's obvious 'she' is your FIRST love, but honey lemme tell you... SHE aint LOVING you back, and when shit hits the fan, you just another blk man that bit the dust. She is the QUEEN of conniving, deceit, and dishonesty. She is A TRAP! Nothing good will ever come out of running up in her.
It's time my dear for you to grow up and be a MAN! You told me if I stayed loyal to u then you would hold me close to ur heart. After 3 yrs my loyalty has never faltered. Even though I've left to protect my own heart, and then came back when I found out that it just wasn't beating the same without you. I still love u the same today, as I did 3yrs ago.
It hurts me how we are so close, but yet and still so far apart.
Please understand, I don't wanna change you, I just want you to GROW! And as far as other women are concerned... I'm the 80, and all of them together probably still don't equal that "20". No this is not me saying I'm willing to share you(b/c that will NEVER happen) but I do recognize that guys will be guys, and I'm not stupid, dumb, or naive.
I wish I could read your mind. I'm sitting here WISHING that I did not love you so much! Wishing that I could look at you how I would look at any other guy. But I can't, and I don't know why.
I feel like GOD is playing a cruel joke on me everytime we talk. It's the sweetest torture I've ever known.
"What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?" Matthew 16:26
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love the letter... feels good to have a new fresh face on blogger with words that speaks volumes like yours.. keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteCompeting with the streets is a serious challenge. I hope you win this one!
ReplyDeleteSecretia
I have been here, quite a few times...I had to let go, because the "streets" called his name too often...I couldnt compete...
ReplyDeleteWhat is there left to say? You've said it all!
ReplyDeletei can relate. streets = career in my case. in the age where women want to accomplish everything at all cost, yet don't realize they're stacking their plate too full. i war with my chick over her aspirations that she thinks includes me, but all of them just push me further down the line on her checklist of priorities.
ReplyDeleteyou killed it at "it hurts me how we are so close, but yet & still so far apart". that's how i'm always feeling.
good read. gotta check ya check ya out lol.