So, my Love Chronicles about the current guy I'm talking to is in the drafts because I got busy, but before I decide to finish it..there's some shit I gotta get off my chest because I know.. I'm dead... ass.. wrong. Mr. Lucky Number 7/ Mr. Que Psi Phi is what he'll be introduced as and he doesn't want a relationship. We've talked about it and after whatever happened between him and his ex I think he's pretty much scarred for life. He's not willing to take a chance with someone new because it's time consuming, you have to get to know them, court them, do your best to impress them and blah blah blah.. it's very draining.. I agree, except that I haven't given up on giving someone else the chance to win over my heart. In fact at this very moment, I am more open than ever to truly being THAT WOMAN.. The best friend, lover, confidant.. all that good stuff. The help mate (and I'm not even religious), I just want to be needed, but not taken advantage of.. Moving on.
He's not ready for a relationship, any other time with any other guy, this would be an issue and I wouldn't stand for it. I've longed ago began to differentiate between just a fuck, and a guy with boyfriend potential.. and he's definitely boyfriend potential despite the scarring, but I guess good women are like bandages right?? We make all wounds better... So I'm wrong because we've been having a sexual relationship, with no signs of commitment only a "I mean if I didn't care about you I wouldn't let this go so far"... now, I know the game, and I know damn well that a man will take it that far just for some pussy.. will tell you anything u want to hear to get the goods. But.. this guy seems too sincere. I can smell bullshit from a mile away but for some reason when he's near all I smell is roses. He honestly isn't giving me the vibes that he's just bull shitting me, and that's where this set up comes in. He said it clear as day to me, no mumbling no nothing, this is not a good time for a relationship.. he plays football so that's understandable.. This semester I'll be busy with some top secret stuff myself *smile* so I'm all for it. Ok, this isn't a good semester for him.. But hold up, this sounds too familiar. Ok now I remember my best friend told me the same thing after we started fucking then 2 weeks later he had a girlfriend that wasn't me.
I'm not anxious to have that happen again.. I was deeply hurt by that, and I told Lucky Number 7 this. But I also told him, that if he decided I wasn't the girl for him, I wouldn't be mad at him at all because I know I know better than to completely set the red flags on fire just to get temporary gratification.If this doesn't end up how I want it to yes I will be hurt, but no I will not be angry. Because the truth is that this is a set up. And I orchestrated the entire thing.
Ladies take a lesson from me, a man will tell you the truth you just gotta listen. But you can't be upset when you choose to hear what he didn't say.
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